Dearest TommyTopHat,
As of writing this letter, I am stark naked and clinging to the back of Grigori Rasputin as he hurtles along on a stolen motorbike. Words simply cannot describe how terrified I am right now.
Seeing as how Rasputin ripped off my teddy bear costume, I am afraid that I have no choice but to remain in this nude state. Hopefully, only a small number of people will be blinded by the sight of my beautiful body. But I digress. This is merely a short note to let you know that we are all indeed still alive, though the Elvilluminati are still in hot pursuit of us. Rasputin has concluded there is only one place we can hide now: Las Vegas. They’d never expect us to hide in a place swarming with Elvis impersonators. And you never know, we may even uncover a few more clues as to the true location of the King himself. I shall write more after we’ve arrived there.
Hugs and kisses,
Mr Popsley
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